here's to X

Here's to 22

Here's to 22 and saying goodbye to 21

Saying goodbye to the best and worst year of my life

I gained a lot:

a new job

new friends

new wealth and life lessons

and lost

love

my happiness

myself

Here's to 22

21 was hard

She was angry, and sweet, and rough but gentle

She was confusing and hard to figure out

Full of life and yet so dull

22 looks at her with tired but hopeful eyes, hoping that she can take the reigns a little easier and guide them to a better place then they were a year ago

Here's to 22, as she bends down and kisses 21's cheek, and pats her head before saying, "you can let go now"

And with those words 21 becomes immortalized forever, as we writers say.

Here's to 22 and saying goodbye to 21.

Here's to 23

Here's to 23.

22 was hard, almost as hard as 21, but she was also full of life, and loud, she took up space and danced on empty bar floors

She learned to care for herself

in mind

in body

in everything

22 has been heartbroken, shoved in the ground face first screaming to get some air

Then she got up, dusted herself off and started again

22 was wild

She loved boldly and fiercely, she found her person, she found herself

And in 22 I found me and as I gaze towards 23 with open eyes and stitched together heart, I kiss 22 goodbye and wish her well, a single tear for the memories that were her and become her

Goodbye 22 and hello 23

Here's to 24

23 was brutal, she stands, tired and warned down, tears masked with mascara and bloody knuckles

Tired and yet so happy to be where she is

23 was full of strife, of long nights begging God to ease the pain, to show her the way, for the Universe to give her a sign that it was all worth it

23 was slow and steady, giving up one day and re-starting her whole life the next, she was hard working and full of spite, she was a beautiful, chaotic, cosmically humorous age

23 looks at 24 with tired yet soft eyes, excited to return to the graveyard of years and pass on the baton of my life, she tells 24 to be kind, to be bold, to be you

She pushes her hair back and gives her a kiss, smiling as she walks away

23 was a fighter, a yell in the face of anyone who crossed her yet love so wholly it sometime consumed her

23 felt everything, every emotion, every down and every up

23 was beautiful, coming into her own and setting the stage for a peaceful and fulfilled 24

24 is excited

24 is brand new yet old at the same time. 24 is ready to start this new chapter and not pull any of her punches

24 is a dreamer, a giver, a stand up for what she believes in, stubborn, and wild classy mess

24 is here and she is here to stay for a while

I am so excited to be 24

***

author's note:

I started writing these the week of my birthday, having an outlet to reflect briefly yet rawly on the year I had before. The personification of emotions and numbers has always been a favorite writing choice of mine. Being able to tell your story in a short snippet yet remember exactly the year is something I've grown so fond of. I'm excited to keep this tradition :)